the post that i forgot to title. and it's late. forgive me. (a guest post).

once upon a time …

there was a boy.

that boy LOVED planes.  he loved looking at planes.  he loved watching planes.  he loved reading about planes.  (ok fine.  he didn’t LOVE reading.  but I’m rather positive he just enjoyed looking at the pictures.) 

the boy decided that one day … he would FLY planes.

and then he grew up.

and he learned to FLY planes. 

and dreamed of flying around the world.  carefree.  exploring.

and that my friends … is where this fairy tale comes to a complete. screeching. halt.

kinda like one of those scenes in a movie where …

a guy saunters into a nightclub where everyone is crazily dancing to some throbbing beat – and the dj-spinner-guy would quietly set his hand down onto the record and there would be a loud SCREEEEEEECH.  and everyone turns to look at the guy that just walked in.

OR.

a stagecoach is barreling out of control and then the hero comes flying onto the scene on his trusty golden palomino horse, jumping onto the stagecoach and pulling the team of horses to a complete stop.  dust flying.  hooves sliding.  cowboy music playing.

OR.

a boy.  falls.  for a girl.  and the world quietly stops.  and there is nothing else.  only the two of them. 

i am that girl.  and my husband is that boy.

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i received an email from anna asking me to guest post on her blog the pilot’s wife … here, obviously.  and in that email she mentioned “I have not seen mention of your husband being a pilot .”  and i responded … “he is.  but i don’t talk about it much.  because it doesn’t DEFINE me.”

and then? … i pondered those words.  i chewed on them for several days.  i spoke them to my husband.  and he kinda laughed at me and my confusion about the whole "playing of the blog".  he tossed away my self imposed analyzing (and re-analyzing and re-re-analyzing) of the things that i say or do.  (please note - this wasn't him being rude ... i just apparently REALLY like to analyze things.)  

……………………………………………………………….

why should what my husband do for a career define ME? 

i am a mommy.  i am a daughter and a sister and a friend.  i am a shoulder to cry on.  i am a chocolate lover and a not-as-often-as-i-would-like wine enjoyer.  i am a speech-language pathologist and a photographer (though that’s still incredibly hard for me to write).  i am a zookeeper for a house of pets. i am the laundry-putter-away-er.  i am my own dish fairy most days.  i'm the dishwasher filler and usually the dishwasher emptier.  i am a creator and a storyteller and a finder of beauty-full things.  i am the finder of most “lost” things.

i am me.  

and.

i am a wife. 

and he just happens to be a pilot.

and it’s funny.  because although my husband’s career doesn’t DEFINE me … it hovers over everything that i do … justaboutpractically EVERYTHING. 

because of his chosen career … i am a part time single parent.  i am the one that is solely responsible for keeping several souls alive for days at a time. 

i have to find care above and beyond me when i have my above and beyond things to do.  i can’t assume that i will have someone there in the evening or at night. 

i had to create my own personal flightplan for if something were to go wrong in the middle of the night … because there is only one of me and oh-so-many of them. 

we are constantly in transition.  between the daddy leaving and the daddy coming home.  occasionally … often … we don’t complete a full transition before the next transition begins.  i get torn in so many directions.  and i only have two hands.  and i can’t keep everyone happy all the time.  which is hard.

and it sucks.

bigtime.

then again?

i’m unbelievably thankful (though I don’t always show it).  i have this amazing husband that is incredibly aware of how lucky he is to have time … at home … with me and the kids. 

he jumps in and helps with the laundry (hence my mostly clean-clothing-put-away status) and the fixit stuff and the dishes.   and i sometimes think that maybe quite actually my husband is home more than those with a regular full time job.  (it just so happens to be for days at a time rather than a few hours).

and we are so lucky to have a village … family and friends that are more-than-willing to help out when i need something.  anything.  we are at a place right now where we have that.  though i know it won’t always be that way since there’s always the possibility of a move. 

we're lucky to have what we have.

and I’m so thankful for hotel soap.

because dude.  I haven’t had to buy soap in YEARS.

……………………………………………………………….

though that? ... might just be another post for another time. 

and i'd be happy to come back and guestpost again.

because although this topic doesn't define me (and my blog) ... it feels kinda good writing about it.

feel free to stop by and visit me at my blog ... HERE.

……………………………………………………………….

what are you thankful for ... today?